[maemo-community] Maemo Community Award. vi_. N950. Job done.

[From: Paul Sleggs]

I am autonominating myself for an N950 commission.I am nominating myself 
because I deserve one.There, I said it.I am not going to buff your pylon 
with faux whimsical bullcrap to project a defensive screen of 
nonchalance to laminate the true motivation behind my entry. You are 
offering free hardware.Not just any hardware, one of the most desirable 
pieces of pocket computing to have been manufactured in the past 5 
years.The mailing list has been swamped with entries from ghosts who 
have just heard there are some free phones going.They do not deserve a 
community award.I deserve a community award and I have earned one.To 
deny my nomination would be to undermine the very point of the community 
awards and to make a mockery of the long standing tenants that are so 
central and important to the ancient and noble community awards tradition.

I deserve a CA on account of the sheer volume of my useful contribution 
to MO in the form of help, knowledge and to a lesser extent, wiki work.I 
base my submission on this and the fact that I do not qualify for any of 
the other categories.I would like an N950 please.Yes, the shiny one.Feel 
free to announce my ascension to the level of N950 owner before or after 
the submission deadline, I do not mind.

There are dozens of such cases of my unmitigated dedication to the 
community's success.One of the best metrics of this is MO karma.As a 
non-code contributing, non old-schooler, non ex-council member I have an 
imperial shit ton of karma, more so than any other TMO user of my type.I 
have almost twice as many 'thanks' as posts on TMO. This is good 
indication of the quality of my input.

It seems so passé to list my contributions, as to list them is to 
tarnish the sheen of my ego.However I shall attempt to distil the 
essence of the magnitude of my contribution to MO with some trivial 
examples.I have been an active TMO member since the beginning of 2011 
when I received my first N900.Since then I have consistently been 
solving problems for users whom are suffering from a lesser Linux 
endowment.Since this time I have relentlessly provided, scripts, hacks 
and bodges for fellow TMO users to address the weird niggles in ways 
that no other user can even conceive of.My very first ever post was a 
script for running with CRON for 'smart email checking WRT condition of 
wifi module'.You remember the person who orchestrated the 'N900 for 
davyp' (javaME for n900 developer).BANG, that was me.NEXT PROBLEM 
PLEASE.You remember when some users where discussing ways to enable the 
longpress of the camera focus button while the n900 was locked.The best 
solution they had come up with was dbus-scripts doing some pokey 
haxery.'chmod 444 /path/to button/disable'BAM.JOB DONE.Next problem.You 
remember the guy who could not access backup menu because his keyboard 
slide detector was broken?I provided a 1-liner that edited his 
'rc-early' to check the camera slide instead of the keyboard.BOOM 
HEADSHOT.JUST BRING IT.Who trawled through the gst-dsp lib code to 
figure out how to reduce the JPG compression for better photos? ME.GET 
SOME. (All hail FMG for implementing this, praise his might).When a user 
could not determine if it was his LCD that was defective, who sent him 
their spare on the single proviso he would pass it on the next user who 
may need it for trouble shooting.YEAH BABY, TWAS I.

This stuff is not coding.This is not even particularly witty.But it is 
solutions to problems that TMO users have faced.My time is spent helping 
others use their devices.They enjoy their N900s because I am here to 
facilitate this.That is community, that is dedication and that is the 
type of behaviour that deserves an award.

This is not an award for coders who wrote an egg timer in QML, it is an 
award for contributors who have kept TMO alive.Even after most of the 
big dick hitters have left for greener pastures made of robots.These 
awards are for the members who have remained.They have stood firm, as 
the last bastions of Maemo, defenders of mobile open source pocket sized 
computing.In the face of absolute obliteration posed by an army of 
i-clone green robots we have stood our ground and never quit.Against the 
flakfire of whatsapp drones crackling overhead and mortars of redundancy 
raining down, taking out our sharing plugins one by one.Despite the 
overwhelming quiet from the bodies of our fallen comrades who's accounts 
have grown silent. We will fight obsolescence on the landing grounds, we 
will fight it in the app stores and on the streets.We will defend our 
tiny notion...of what a smart telephone is, I will never surrender!

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